…I suppose I want to ask you.  Was it worth it, losing the joy?  Was that sick, perverted, lousy little project that made less than a million dollars, worth what it cost you?  After fair warning?  Was that dinky little award won in Turkey worth what it cost you?  Was the press conference in Berlin when she embarrassed you by demanding to sit in the center..and took the stage when you were the honoree…worth what it cost you?  Do you always find joy so expendable, to be sacrificed to the lowest of the low?  Is joy so expendable to you?  For heavens sakes, why?